The Real American Value Menu
The Real American Value Menu
A satirical breakdown of how you're getting grilled harder than a Quarter Pounder.
🧠 Now the Deep-Fried Truth…
You think capitalism is free-market? Cute. The real puppeteers don’t even have public names on buildings. They’re called:
- BlackRock – controls $10 trillion in global assets
- Vanguard – ~$7 trillion, owns your retirement
- State Street – $4 trillion, invests for the 1%
These three own controlling shares in most major companies. Fox, CNN, Tesla, Amazon, Pfizer, Lockheed — all of them. They profit from your student loans, your insulin, your housing, and your defense budget. Your suffering is their yield.
💸 Your 401(k)? Their ATM
That retirement fund you’ve been told to “max out” every year? It’s Wall Street’s piggy bank. Your 401(k) doesn’t empower you — it feeds their speculation. When the market crashes, you lose. They get bailed out. Again.
🧱 Economic Slavery in a Happy Meal Box
- Your money is backed by… nothing.
- Your rent is owned by investment firms.
- Your medical bills fund stockholders.
- Your labor subsidizes corporate tax breaks.
They don’t want your Social Security protected — because it’s the one pile of cash not yet inside their casino. They want it privatized. Invested. Monetized. Yours? Gone in a crash.
⚠️ “But We Can’t Afford It” Is a Lie
You’ve been told we’re broke. Funny. We can always afford tax cuts, bombs, bank bailouts, and weapons for foreign governments. But not housing, food, or healthcare? That’s the psyop. That’s the menu scam.
🚀 Here’s What We Could Do Tomorrow
Medicare for All
− $1.5 trillion/year
No more medical debt or GoFundMes
Cut Military Budget in Half
+ $440 billion/year
Still #1 in global spending
Tax Wealth Over $10M
+ $400 billion/year
Still lets the rich stay rich
End Fossil Fuel Subsidies
+ $20 billion/year
Transition to green jobs
🧠 Final Thought: You’re Not Broke, You’re Robbed
This isn’t about left or right. It’s about up and down. Your enemy isn’t your neighbor on food stamps. It’s the exec who owns a Russian nesting doll styl yacht in a yacht with Helicopter pads, and pays less tax than your grandma.
This is not a bug. It’s the system working as designed.
THEY have the money. We have the people. We just need the will to break the cycle. STOP EVERYTHING.
— The Dude
